Family Child Care Home

 Someone To Care For Me: Family Child Care and Learning Center

The things that are most important in a Family Child Care Home and Learning Center are those things that children have in their own homes.  We can only fit so much in our homes if we live there too. Providing that I have a building especially designed like a home with many rooms for my child care home only and I don’t live there, it will be set up differently than if I designed my own home for this purpose. The way the home is built will determine which rooms will be for learning or play curriculum.

My anti-bias family child care and learning center

In my child care home I will have sections like in the video where children will always want to be. As you walk in there will be a place to welcome the children and families where in the winter months they will be able to help the child undress from their outer wear as well as say their goodbyes, see you later and have a great day. There will also be somewhere there that will assist those children whose parents are running late or just want to drop off and pick up but I will encourage parents to spend as much time as possible with their child when bringing them to my child care home.

 Once they enter the learning area, there will be the area for eating, they will learn to set the table and clean up afterward according to age. During the morning if the child has not had breakfast they will be allowed to eat. And the same for those that come later in the day or around lunch time. It is very important that a child is well fed before they start their day.

There will be the learning room(s), which will be set up according to age. The rooms will be filled with shelve for books, pictures, and scheduled, calendars, toys both for girls and boys. The books will be for all subjects for age appropriate learners.  We will do all our learning in the education room. I will have a room naptime, a room for playtime; a room like in the video when a child is has a hard time following the curriculum and wants to express their emotions.  There will be a large play area where there will be age appropriate toys and games.  I would like to have a movie room for family night, sofas, lounging chairs, mats, bean bags all sort of lounging furniture so that everyone feels at home.

The entire home will have picture’s that are diverse and anti-bias. I can say that I will be particular about my selections. I would want to set everything up and have an open house invite other child care professionals and parents to visit my home before I go into full operation to get their opinions and input, criticism, and praises. Hopefully more praises.

I want to display picture that are not biased in any way and place in my family child care home and learning center those things that promote a healthy and happy, and anti-bias environment for learning and for play. I want every child and family to feel welcome. There are many details to be developed and plans to make.

Derma-Sparks, L. & Edwards, J.O. (2010) Anti-Bias Education for Young Children and Ourselves. "Creating an Anti-Bias Learning Community”  Chapter  4,

 " National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) Washington, DC

Course Media: "Welcome to an Anti-Bias Learning Community" https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebapps%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_2098014_1%26url%3D

Course Media: "Building on Children’s Strengths"   https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebapps%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_2098014_1%26url%3D

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To my colleagues & Dr. Weems

 

WHAT HAVE I LEARNED?

 

One hope that you have when you think about working with children and families who come from diverse backgrounds (any format and any length)

My hope for myself is to learn to communicate with families and children so that they will feel comfortable in communicating with me. Comfort for me is to be able to allow another person  know when I need help and when they (Child or Family) they need more that I can give them. It is very important to remember I don’t have all the answers and have enough support from colleagues and other early childhood professionals to help me to maintain a professional and friendly atmosphere for the children and the families of those children.

One goal you would like to set for the early childhood field related to issues of diversity, equity, and social justice (any format and any length)

Diversity is one of the areas I would like to explore on a deeper level.  Equity and Social Justice will hold big poster boards

Definition of Diversity

        The concept of diversity encompasses acceptance and respect.  It means understanding that each individual is unique, and recognizing our individual differences.  These can be along the dimensions of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, socio-economic status, age, physical abilities, religious beliefs, political beliefs, or other ideologies.  It is the exploration of these differences in a safe, positive, and nurturing environment. It is about understanding each other and moving beyond simple tolerance to embracing and celebrating the rich dimensions of diversity contained within each individual.

 

A brief note of thanks to your colleagues

You guys have are a blessing to my life. I have never had so much information that I could actually use. (lol) These last eight weeks have been a challenge for me with work and family; I don’t know what I would have done without you. Thanks for all your feedback and your expertise. I look forward to finishing up this segment of my early childhood degree. I look forward to seeing some of you in my last few classes. I appreciate you all. THANK S TO ALL OF YOU.

Dr. Weens, it was my pleasure and thanks for the time you have dedicated to helping me. I really appreciate you.

Have a great holiday. Enjoy your break too, I will.

Creating Art

 

Children are only a loan to us from God, sooner or later we have to give them back.

Children are only a loan to us from God; we have to love them no matter what they do,  Children are only a loan from God, they learn they play and grow.

Children are only a loan from God, keeping and caring, teaching and sharing, being their loving guide. Loving them in this world of malice and strife and keeping them alive.

Children are from God as a source of strength and a way to keep life growing. Children are from God those that leave on such short notice leave our hearts unknowing.

 Children from God soon return from above. Children are from God. Children from God deserve to be loved.

My prayers go out to the parents, grand-parents, family and friends for the lost lives recently taken by the child of God that somehow became lost.

 

 

"We Don't Say Those Words in Class!"

A time when you witnessed an adult (or yourself) reprimand or silence a child after he or she pointed out someone they saw as different (e.g., "That lady talks funny," " That man only has one leg!" "Why is that man so pretty!"). Include what the child said and what the adult did or said in response. (Note: If you cannot think of a specific time ask a friend or family member.)

My granddaughter made a comment about a lady that was overweight.

She said “Grandma, look at the lady, isn’t she so fat? I said to her, you should not talk about people. She may have a medical problem and it causes her to be overweight. She might not be able to lose weight.

What messages might have been communicated to this child by the adult's response

My granddaughter believes that I will not tell her anything wrong.  If she calls someone fat, she will not do it around me. I try to instill good values to all my children.

An example of how an anti-bias educator might have responded to support the child's (or classroom's ) understanding

As an educator it is our responsibility to teach our children not to judge people and when they say something negative we need to correct them in a positive way by turning what they say into something good.

The classroom is their second place for learning. Children learn things they say at home or in the environments they visit most outside their home and from other children.

Go to UTube and watch this video. You gotta see it!

    "Kids say the darnest things"  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8aprCNnecU "I don't like you mommy"

Blog: Gender, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation

 Your response to those who believe that early childhood centers should avoid the inclusion of books depicting gay or lesbian individuals such as same-sex partnered families

I believe that children should be sheltered from certain things until a certain age. When children are exposed to same sex relationships such as having two mom’s or two dads, parent should educate children to the degree in which the child understands. You can’t tell a two year old “mom like sue and we’re in love and expect the child to understand. Children should learn age appropriate materials on gay and lesbians. The same holds for same sex partners. I don’t feel that it should be avoided; I feel that it should be decided at what age/grade children should be exposed to information about people that live this type of lifestyle.

 

If you have ever used or heard homophobic terms such as "fag," "gay," "homo," "sissy," "tom boy," or "lesbo" as an insult by a child toward another child? Or, by an adult toward a child? Describe what occurred. How might these types of comments influence all children? (Note: if you have not had a personal experience, ask a family member, friend, or colleague)

I have experienced my grandson saying or calling my daughter gay. He is five and she is thirteen. I’m sure he has heard and adult in a conversation with another adult say the word “gay” when referring to someone or the subject of the conversation. When I heard him say to my daughter “T.T. you’re gay, I asked him what gay meant. He laughed and said I don’t know.  I explained to him as best I could why T.T. wasn’t gay, but at five years old how could I explain to him what gay was/is? I just asked him not to say it anymore until he knew what he was saying and I told him to ask his dad what it meant. I know for a fact that he does not watch anything on television but educational programs or cartoons. Where he heard those words came from an adult. My best reaction at the time was to ask his dad.

Both internalized privilege and internalized oppression derive from misinformation about one's social identity group (e.g., being 'less than' or 'more than' other groups) and from the societal realities and messages (both overt and covert) about power differences between groups. While young children do not yet understand the full implication of the power and resource differences they observe around them, seeds of ideas about power and social identity do plant themselves and come to flower more fully in later childhood" (Derman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010, p. 17).


"I will no sit by and allow my grand  child to be confused about what gay or any of the other sexisms. When he becoms age appropiate, I will talk to his parents about things he should know. All aprents are not aware of what children should and should not know and at what age thesy shoiuld know." Thanks God they (my children/grandchildren) have me.

Team Building Collaboration, Part 2

        It is always a great feeling to know that there are people in the world that have good qualities. I have enjoyed learning about the early childhood field since I started my studies a few years ago. Today I am well equipped with knowledge about young children and the families, teachers, and other early childhood professionals that support those children and their families. I am blessed to be a member of the ECE community and privileged to have meet people like you that help foster my education and learning experiences. Childhood does not discriminate, it is the people of this world that put biases that cause conflict in early childhood and early childhood education. I have become a better communicator for the children and you all have contributed to my learning experiences whether it was in this class or another, whether we communicate online, in the classroom or from across the world, we are one.

      I would especially like to thank Dr. Hampshire for bring new ideas and information about how we communicate with child, teachers, and all the people we encounter in a lifetime. As a result of this class which has made me a better communicator, I would like to thank my colleagues for your share experiences, the strength you have added to my courage, and all your well wishes. In this class and all the classes I have conquered up to this point in my studies, I pray for better tomorrows and thank God for my past experiences that which has brought me to this point in my life. Just for today my life is evolving to the person that I have always wanted to be, helping children and supporting the families of those children and to bettering my community.

       I encourage each of you to continue doing what works for you. Whether it is childcare, early education or being an advocate for young children, do your best. We may not solve all the problems or be able to reach all the children we encounter but the hope is in the effort we put forth. We cannot save the world but we can contribute to the well-being of children one child at a time. Thank You!

Miss Leslie

ECE
Stay in Touch
leslieturner2011@att.net
leslie.turner2@waldenu.edu
 

 

Team Building and Collaborations, Part 1

Think about which aspects of the groups made for the hardest good-bye. Are high-performing groups hardest to leave? Groups with the clearest established norms? Which of the groups that you participated in was hardest to leave? Why? What sorts of closing rituals have you experienced or wish you had experienced?

A few years ago I worked in a packaging plant with a group of people that made me feel like family from day one of my employment. After working there for a number of years we all had become more family oriented and share birthdays, children graduating, babies being born, and all the things that families do. When I found another job (my current employer), I put in my resignation and began my process to depart. The next few weeks seem like it was the end of the world. I know my co-workers were sad to see me leave. My emotions were on a roller coaster and the transition was very hard for me. 

The work we did required team work and the effort every one put in allow us to reap the rewards at the end of the completed task. I will never forget those people and I know they haven’t forgotten me. I see them from time to time and we catch up on our children, our own personal life and make sure we have updated information for each other. I learned a lot about friendships and communication form the people I worked with for many years. 

A few days before my last assigned day they threw a party with plenty of food and gifts. Since I was leaving the plant (assembly line) and getting out of the work boots and coveralls, the gifts consist of money, gift cards, well wishes and a lot of tears. They knew I needed a while new look and the gifts consisted of things like stockings and gift card telling me to buy some new dresses, pay for parking, and get some more girly type things like lip stick and nail polish.

When you work on an assembly line no one care how you look and the coveralls hid everything anyway.

 How do you imagine that you will adjourn from the group of colleagues you have formed while working on your master's degree in this program? Why is adjourning an essential stage of teamwork?

It is always easy to make new friends and so hard to let go, so I hope I never have to. I have had the opportunity to take a few classes with some of my colleagues that I’m learning with now and I appreciate the feedback, suggestions and answers I have received since starting my master’s in education. I hope to see them at commencement so I can hug each one of them and thank them personally for their help.  I don’t think and adjournment will ever happen. And long as we continue in the field of early childhood we will always be colleagues. I don’t like good-byes or the thought of not seeing my friends. It is essential that we grow in our knowledge and experience so adjournments are a part of colleagues taking what they know and sharing with others so that we can make this world a better place for young children and the families of those children.

Me and one of my colleagues when we graduated withour first masters.

I graduated before her and had already taken my graduation pictures. When she graduated and was ready to take her pictures she asked me to pose with her because I inspired her to go back to school. I was so honored that she asked me. Her name is Carolyn. She is now working on and about to complete her PH.D. Me and her worked together for many years, and still for the same employer today, just at a different location. Carolyn has put togethe a "shout out" as she call it for all our other colleagues that have went back to school to futher their education and/or change their career. We stay in contact and encourage each other all the time.

Youdon't want this type of friendship to end.

 

Effective Communication

 

 

Who am I as a Communicator?

I asked a few of my co-workers how they handle specific problems and how the learned to be effective in communicating with others.

 

When I have a disagreement with someone, my first reaction to shut down. This allows me to time to stop and think. I use to jump to the defense whenever I had a disagreement with someone. What conflict does is it get people to thinking. First reaction is not always the best reaction. I have learned to listen longer, speak less, and look a person in the eye. Now you have my attention.

I asked a few of my co-workers to give me some advice on effective communication.

Co-worker # 1

“I have learned that by allowing the person to vent whatever the problem is and listen effectively without interrupting. This allows the person to know that I am truly concerned about their situation”

Co-worker # 2

“I have learned to be respectful of the other person, even though there is opposition. Also listening to the other side is helpful. Not being demeaning or closed minded. And if it appears to bring the resolution to the problem, voice your opinion with facts not emotional feelings.”

Co-worker #3

“I’ve learn to hear the opposing party out before commenting. Take deep breaths to maintain my composure to ensure I have all the facts before commenting.”

Co-worker # 4

This is my supervisor. “First keep in mind the overall mission, goal or objective. Listen to others concerns and then apply practices that provide a win-win situation.”

 

Any comments?

 

 

 

Who Am I as a Communicator?

What is the one thing that surprised you the most? Why? What other insights about communication did you gain this week? Choose at least two to share with others through your blog and consider how each might inform your professional work and personal life.

I am a very confident person when it comes to communicating with others. I work with people face-to-face every day of the week and on the weekends I like to be free to go and do as I please. At my work place I have rules and guidelines and when I ‘m at home I still have rules and guidelines for myself. I say what I feel in most situations and at times I mask my feeling to avoid making people think I am not who I say I am. Sometime I want to be quiet and other times I want to be noticed, not for what I do but for who I am. I like making others happy.

My communication anxiety inventory score says that I’m comfortable communicating in most situations, and I say it’s true. I sometimes hold back my feelings and emotions to keep from hurting someone else’s feeling or sometimes even telling the truth in fear of hurting another person, but that I’m very confident. Why can’t I allow my feeling to be shared with others is be4cause I think others will not share what I feel. I rarely allow people to know when I’m hurting or afraid not because I’m a pion because I don’t want anyone to know my week spots.

I had one of my co-workers evaluate me using the same inventory. I explained to her that she needs to express her feelings towards me and to answer the questions truthfully. I also picked this person because when we’re at work she tends to say things to me when people are around that give me the impression that she is trying to belittle me or make herself look like she is all that and a bag of chips.

When I reviewed her responses to the communication anxiety inventory our scores both fell in the low level meaning that I feel comfortable communicating in most situations and feel confident in such encounters.

On the verbal aggressiveness scale my co-worker rank me significant,  meaning that I cross the line going from “argumentative” which attacks  person’s position or statement, and verbal aggression which involves  personal attack. I know why she answered this way.  I ranked myself moderate. I will fight for what I think is right and not allow a person to ridicule me to make them look good. Me and this particular co-work well together on most days.  I feel I maintain a good balance between respect and considerations for others viewpoints.  I won’t allow people to embarrass me either.

My listening skills are sympathetic to others so therefore my listening skills help me to build relationships. Group 1 on the rating scale. My “self- concept” (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012, p. 47) shapes the way I treat others. Where I work allows me to use my communication skills on a daily basis. Through practice, understanding, and what I am learning in this class, my skills are improving.

O’Hair, D., Weimann, M. (2012) Real communication: An introduction. Bedford/St. Martin (2nd ed) Boston-New York

 

 

 

Communication and Cultures

Do you find yourself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures?

Yes I often find myself in this situation. I provide customer service to all nationalities and to people from all cultures and groups.

If yes, in what ways do you communicate differently?

I have not yet mastered a second language. I do speak well enough to be able to know what the person is saying. I use things like pointing, asking questions in my own language because I know that even when people can’t speak the language they can understand what you are saying.

When communicating with a person from another culture or group it is always better to have someone that fully understand their language besides you interpreting the language.

Food for thought

Do you think it's rude when Hispanic people speak spanish in public?

“My friends and i were talking about this earlier in school, ok so my friend rides a bus to a tech school from high school everyday, and the bus driver is Hispanic, and this Hispanic girl sits in front of him speaking Spanish with bus driver, and he gets mad whenever they speak speak Spanish in front of him, he says that This is the united states are main language is English and it should stay this way. i am a little irritated EVEN IN MY ENGLISH CLASS they even speak Spanish!! its so rude to me whenever they speak spanish in a damn English class. we had groups today and we were moving around and my teacher puts me with this Hispanic girl and she barely knew english, she gave me a angry look like she didnt want to talk to me, but i didnt do anything i was just asking her about the study questions? but she decided not to anwser me and gave me a bad look, i think shes racist against americans i dont know... well have you had this experience before?, if so tell, when and where and this happened.”

Yahoo.com –Yahoo answers. Retrieved September 20, 2012 from http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20120318200545AA4TrOu

Non-verbal communication-Action does not speak louder than words.

I take responsibility for actions and my words.

What assumptions did you make about the characters and plot based on the ways in which you interpreted the communication you observed?

I watch the show “The Office” on TBS channel 247. Watching the show without sound was pretty interesting to me because I have never watched a show without the sound. The interpretations I perceived where that the show was pretty boring or serious from the look on the characters faces. I do not know how to read lips although I attempted to do so as I tried to make out some of the words. I was way off. The scenery appeared to have taken place in a conference room and then it switched to a barn yard setting. The people conversing had sad looks on their faces; I thought it was concerning an illness of someone or maybe even a death, very sad. Non-verbal communication of such scenes was pretty confusing to me and if this was a test I would have failed. The show was pretty boring to me and I would most likely not ever watch it again.

Would your assumptions have been more correct if you had been watching a show you know well?

No, and even If I have watched the show more than once.  It’s like watching for the 10^th time. If it were a series, I would have assumed that I knew what a particular character would be saying and that’s only if I had seen the particular show more than once. I only assume that I would be correct. I would have to watch the show in silence while recording myself mimicking the words and then listening to the recording. I probably would have the meaning of what that character was saying not exact words.

The body gestures, the facial expressions all could mean something other than what I would be thinking. This theory was proven to me in the exercise.

”Electric communication will never be a substitute for the face of someone who with their soul encourages another person to be brave and true. “ --Charles Dickens

”The limits of my language means the limits of my world.” --Ludwig Wittgenstein

Quotes retrieved from http://humanresources.about.com/od/interpersonalcommunicatio1/a/quotes_nonverb.htm

What is Communication

What behaviors does this person exhibit that make him or her effective? Would you want to model some of your own communication behaviors after this person? Why or why not?

I would have to say my mom. I either take my mom to the store every week or I go for her. She writes a list before she goes to the store to make sure she doesn’t forget anything. When I go for her she writes me a list. What we do is to sit down and go over the list before I leave. She writes down every detail; name brand, size, and color, etc… this way I don’t get anything wrong. I kind of like the idea because most people shop brand name or designer. My mom shop sales and if I get to the store and the item is sold out she says get a rain check. If I see something of better quality, better price, or even better quantity I will call her or bring it to her attention if we are together and we negotiate price.

I am very organized and it because of my mom. Everything has a place and every place has a thing.

Whether communication is verbal or written, it is always good to know exactly what the sender is communicating to the receiver. “The rules of grammar, spelling and capitalization all apply” (lol) (Chapter 1, page 18)

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. (2nd ed) Bedford/ St. Martin’s Boston-New York

Professional Hopes and Goals

       One hope that you have when you think about working with children and families who come from diverse backgrounds (any format and any length)

       One goal you would like to set for the early childhood field related to issues of diversity, equity, and social justice (any format and any length)

       A brief note of thanks to your colleagues

My hope for children and families who come from a diverse background is that each one comes to enjoy the classroom as a place where their children will learn and make new friends. Children don’t see color or ethnic background as adults do. Many children learn about color and racism from parents not teachers. As I embark on my journey as an early childhood professional, my hope is that children learn to enjoy learning from one another matter what their race or color, and that they would learn to appreciate the diversity of their peers.

When does it start?

“The foundation of self-awareness is laid when children are infants and toddlers. At these stages, children learn "what is me" and "what is not me." Toddlers are sensitive to the feelings of the adults around them, and they begin to mimic adult behavior. By age two, children recognize and explore physical differences. They are also learning the names of colors, and they begin to apply this to skin color. Natural curiosity will lead to questions about differences.” (Biles, 1994)

My goal(s) I would like to set concerning the issue of diversity, equity, and social justice are to teach parents how to answer question from children about the different color people, the disabled, and the elderly without the biases. Some parents have a tendency to belittle other ethnic groups, people of different social class, and people that are less fortunate in areas of living conditions, finances, and the way other people look. Children learn from home.

 I would like to be able to teach a class where diversity, equity, and social justice and taught without barriers. You can’t say “Richard is black/white but he’s poor.” Or “Jamie is smart but she’s ugly.” People have a way of putting negativity where love is needed most. I taught my children to love and respect everyone even when they don’t get the same in return. “Teach children the right way, and the right way they will lead.” We have to think about the generation after ours and what we want carried on.’

Biles, B. (1994). Activities that promote racial and cultural awareness. In Todd, C.M. (Ed.), *Family child care connections*, 4(3), pp. 1­p; 4. Urbana-Champaign, IL: University of Illinois Cooperative Extension Service

To my instructor Dr. Ferrari, my colleagues, and to my family.

Thanks for all your support and feedback. These last eight weeks have been a challenge for me, not only because of the new materials but also because of new challenges I have faced. I really had to humble myself and be thankful for people like you in my life even if it may only be temporary. I do hope to see all of you in future classes and most importantly in the ECE field. I appreciate you! Good luck with future endeavors.

Welcoming Families From Around the World

The name of “your” family’s country of origin

The country I chose is Italy.

At least five ways in which you will prepare yourself to be culturally responsive towards this family

1.       I would set my classroom up to welcome all countries.

2.       I would try to find out more about the visiting families like, foods they eat, and how they dress.

3.       I know that I an early educator, so I would research early childhood programs from all countries and try to incorporate literature from those countries.

4.       I would prepare my other students to welcome our guess by teaching them something about all countries so that wherever the child is coming from my student will act accordingly.

5.       I would prepare foods from different countries, this way I will have food from their country and foo from other countries to expose the family to different types of food to show the them the diversity of having a meal like they do in their country.

“Cultural responsiveness refers to the ability to take a person’s culture and help that person infuse it into another culture, making it uniquely one. To do this, one must allow for diverse ways of thinking and doing. Respect for the other person’s culture is ranked number one on Nueman’s (1999) list. Teachers must respect and recognize the need to build on what a child already knows about their own language, in order to incorporate the new knowledge. This premise is also supported in an article by Au (1998).”

“According to Au, students achieve better if bi-literacy is attainable. Students only need to learn to read and write once. This knowledge is then transferable from one language to another. In this way students build on their strengths in their home language and add it to what they are learning in the new language. ”

“The benefits of this approach are two- fold. First the student feels valued because their culture is acknowledged. They are able to show what they know. Self-confidence and self-esteem are kept intact. Parents of those students are more likely to get involved as well because they see that their culture is valued and that they too can contribute.” (Neuman,1999)

‘Secondly, with this approach students can maintain and extend literacy in their native language even after they are literate in English. This is a plus for all. Too often students learn English and neglect their native tongue to the detriment of being able to communicate effectively with parents, relatives and others from their culture. What research purports as truth; bi-literacy is best for students, (Au,1998) often doesn’t happen in classrooms throughout the United States. Children are taught English and then lose their native languages, especially in the area of writing. Therefore, a balance of instruction in English as well as the native language must be maintained in order for bi-literacy to become feasible.”

A brief statement describing in what ways you hope that these preparations will benefit both you and the family.

I would want the family to feel welcome  and not miss their home before they have an opportunity to learn about my country so when they do return home they will have good memories about our teachers, our language, and early childhood programs.

Culturally Responsive retrieved from http://msit.gsu.edu/readingprograms/benchmark/analysis/cultural.htm

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice, and Oppression

What memory do I have of an incident when you experienced bias, prejudice, and/or oppression, or witnessed someone else as the target of bias, prejudice, and/or oppression?

I too grew up in a relatively poor neighborhood. I remember as a child we wore hand-me-down cloths, every one pick on me and my brothers and sister because our mother is handicap. I remember defending my mom and getting into fights because where I come from you don’t talk about someone’s mom, no matter what. My friends would also defend my mom because they loved her and she loved them. It didn’t matter that my mom was handicap because she treated all my friends like her own children.

It was hard at first but, as I got older it was easier to accept what other children said because she was and still is the best mom anyone could have for a parent.

In what way(s) did the specific bias, prejudice and/or oppression in that incident diminish equity?

Growing up was fun and as a child I did not know about biases and prejudice. As a teen I recall being picked on by people because I had a crazy eye or as they called me cock-eyed. The boys use to violate me by touching my body parts and because I was cute, (loll) and when I developed those parts I was unaware that they attracted boys. I spent a many of my days running home and crying until my told be to kick-their butts and I did just that. I started to fight them and the touching and feeling stopped.  I had surgery to correct my eyes and the teasing and name calling went away. This was one of the most humiliating times of my life.  

The feelings this incident brought up for me were that I was being abused and I wanted to fight back, and it wasn’t until my mom gave me the ok to fight that I felt in control. It may have not been the best way to handle the situation, but it worked.

It took me reacting to the situation in order to change this incident into an opportunity for greater equity. I was losing the battle until I was giving the go ahead to defend myself. When my mom said that fighting back would stop the boys from violating me I did just that.